so i have fifteen minutes to recap my day and to express how much God has been moving...here goes nothing!
it seems that I have been blinded, not only by my own desires, but the desires of this world. I have been searching for friendship to fulfill this void, this "hole" if you will in my soul. I wanted something deep, something meaningful, on the human level. It seems that eluded me until I began to reconnect with Jonny Carroll. He's deep. Not deep as in, too deep to see the world around you, but instead he's the kind of deep that is able to see the world more clearly because he is down there in the mire with the people. He's fighting just like anyone else to find meaning and purpose in this crazy, broken, weeping, laughing, crying, lovely, beautiful, awful world.
that's how I describe the world. Lots of mixed adjectives, because I think that it can be that way sometimes. For instance today I practiced piano for about an hour, got really good at this song I've been working on, and then went into my lesson and bombed it. It was just great, I mean I worked hard on it, and then I couldn't play it to save my life :) oh well, that isn't the end of the world, but if I let myself focus on it, I know that it would be, it could literally ruin my week...
anyway, I got COM 102 done, and then my spanish homework is actually done before class for once :) also, I got to just relax and work out today as well. such a blessed day. I have a feeling I should enjoy this peace while I can. The next couple days are going to be full of furious paper writing and singing until I faint (I perform in lab on friday! super excited)
so im sitting in the library, wasting time waiting for Jonny to return for his stuff. wish he would hurry up, im dead, not quite sure if i'll make it back to the house without falling asleep on my feet :)
help me to accomplish what you want me to, not just want I want or what I think I have to. Help me to remember how blessed I am. Help me remember peace and quiet in times of noise and chaos....I love you. thank you.
In Jesus' name