Sunday, April 4, 2010

The Adventure Called Life Day 187...afraid...

i am scared. i do not need to be afraid. Jesus is ALIVE, he is King! but yet, I feel afraid. i understand that i do not have reason to feel this way, but i am human. so i am afraid.

my mother has been ill for quite sometime now. she has had a nasty bout with bronchitis. Now i know that bronchitis can be serious in "normally healthy people" but the real kicker is that my mother is also on dialysis. She is also diabetic, and her hands and hips are gnarled from rheumatoid arthritis. She is so frail, so weak. I haven't been afraid for a long time. But today for some reason I was overwhelmed by it. I have never been paralyzed by fear, but I was pretty close to it today. I tried to sing for my family, but I got halfway through the chorus and couldn't stop crying. I cried for about twenty minutes in the bathroom, then came out, and proceeded to cry some more. I didn't stop crying until I said good bye twenty minutes later to my family, then got in the car and cried all the way back to Spring Arbor. I'm crying even now. Its been well over two hours now that I have been teary eyed with this awful knot in the pit of my stomach. I need prayer. My mother needs prayer. If you're reading this, please STOP and PRAY right now....

thank you.


1 comment:

  1. I'm praying for you my dearest Carolyn! Prayers for both you and your mom =]
    Here's a reminder of something you already know:
    Psalm 56:3 "when I am afraid, I will trust in Him." Love you!